So, I’ve never done this before, but…

this year I have put in a request for a specific teacher for the boy’s 4th grade year. 

you see, this past year has been sort of a beating for my Boy, because…

he had a ManTeacher.

not only that, but he had a ManTeacherfromHell…a ManTeacher who has been teaching damn near as long as i have been alive.  He had a ManTeacher that was ALL BIZNESS. 

Which, theoretically, isn’t a bad thing, but for the Boy, he likes to have a little personal connection, which he didn’t have at all with Mr. Cook. 

Now, i’m not saying Mr. Cook was a bad teacher…he’s a good educator, but, to me, he was just always so negative.  I’ll never forget sitting in the pickup line and seeing Mr. Cook standing around outside and hoping that i wasn’t the parent he was going to come tell awful stories to about this or that.  I will never forget that poor hairdresser mom, who i saw afternoon after afternoon standing underneath the oak tree, listening to Mr. Cook go on and on about how bad her kid was, all the while, with her kid standing right there with his head hung low listening…

and i’m not even saying that the kid wasn’t a pain in the ass kid…I’m just saying that i felt for that lady.

I just know that from the moment that Mr. Cook came out to MY car to excitedly inform me that Dane had been commended on his reading TAKS test, yet used that happy moment to remind us both that the math TAKS was coming up and that was his weakest point, I just knew that this guy was a negative reinforcer.  He immediately diffused the happiness about the commendment for reading by telling us that he was probably going to suck on the math one.

I will say that Rob loved Mr. Cook.  I think it was the Army mentality thing.  But I never got the positive from Mr. Cook.

In fact, i remember being in the classroom for a Valentine’s party and having Mr. Cook finally make the connection between the Boy and his older sisters, all of whom he knew either from church or having them in his classroom years ago…and him informing me that ‘he just doesn’t have it.’  His followup to that statement was that Dane didn’t really fuss with presentation or handwriting and that he didn’t seem to stress about much.

He did follow up with the fact that he thought he might get it in the future.

Gee, thanks, Mr. Cook.

So, back to the impending math TAKS test.  I was giving myself a fucking ulcer worrying that Dane didn’t know all of his times tables.  And in turn, i was giving Dane a fucking ulcer worrying that he didn’t know all of his times tables.

Mr. Cook never missed an opportunity to tell me that Dane (yeah, I quit calling him the Boy…he has a name and i’m going to use it on this one) was one of the last kids in the class to memorize them all. 

I took every opportunity to remind Mr. Cook that the kid would do it…and that he was the kid he chose to be the keeper of the secret code for the computers so that whenever any one of these other computer illiterate mofos got stuck trying to take their AR tests (accelerated reader tests, for those of you who don’t know)  in the library, he didn’t have to mess with it. 

I don’t for a moment think that Mr. Cook didn’t recognize that he had in his class a child that could SCHOOL HIM on anything computer related…I know that he did…I also know that regardless of the fact, somehow everything negative about my Boy became more important to him than anything positive.

And frankly, as his mom, I just didn’t like that at all.

For the first time in all of my children’s academic history, i heard the words “i hate school.”

To be honest, i didn’t have a fucking clue how to respond to that statement…as i’d never heard it before.

And at that moment, ladies and gentlemen, was the moment that I vowed he would not have another year like this.  I gave it a shot and i showed up for the parties and I politic’ed with Mr. Cook, but still…all i got was negativity. 

Hell, even when the results came back from the dreaded math TAKS test, all Mr. Cook said was that “you’ll know if you failed.”

And to me, that was too much.

And it was at that very moment that i went from the mom who let the cards fall where they may when it came to teacher selection to the mom who stepped up and said ‘uh…let’s go with the teacher who has taught 2 of my older children and unleashed brilliance and creativity and happy memories of fourth grade.’

Yep, I am now on the ‘PREFERRED TEACHER LIST.’

And i am not a bit sorry for it. 

Hell, i think the kid deserves a year of some positive energy, and if you could see Ms. Looper, you would see that positivity just seeps out of this woman. 

and i can’t wait to see what she does with this kid.

p.s. Dane was commended on the math TAKS.

payback…sort of

way back in the day…back when i was miserable most every day of my life, I used my friends as a sounding board.  they would listen to me kavetch about how miserable i was over and over again and yet, never told me to ’shit or get off the pot.’  They knew very well the situation and managed to keep their thoughts to themselves, while allowing me to vent.  That said, i sort of ‘owe’ some of my friends a shoulder, given the fact that they were my shoulder for so many years. 

To be honest, I am thankful to be the one who gets to listen to someone else’s problems.  I like being the ‘boring one.’  I like that, regardless of my own circumstances that might require my own therapist, i can be of some help to those who are going through shit i’ve gone through already.  I fancy myself as someone who can read situations and advise…after all, i’ve been there and done that.  And, really, the bottom line is the fact that i like to be the ‘therapist’ instead of the one who needs the ‘therapy.’ 

And, really, when it comes down to it, don’t we all just need someone to listen…someone to empathize with us as we go through our own personal battles? 

I think so…and am so thankful for the friends I have had that saw me through my own struggles…those who listened without being judgemental…those who listened and knew that it could be them, but thank God, it was not. 

Sometimes, I still draw on old friends who will listen to me kavetch about this or that, yet I know they won’t judge or try to tell me how to fix it.  They are dear enough friends that they just listen.

I wish that for all of you.

Family Traditions, Part II

Sunday Family Movie day, ala The Dark Knight, our family movie of the day…was fun.  I didn’t adore it, as that genre isn’t really my deal.  I do love that the Boy has already picked out the future family movies we will go see in the coming weeks…and i have to say that not that many of them trip my trigger as MUST SEE movies…but we will go and we will enjoy it and i will be happy knowing that we will have a happy family time while spending four times the amount of the tickets for popcorn and sodas.  blah blah blah, who cares…we’re having family fun time.

As for other traditions…

We always go for frosty drinks on the first day of school and the last…largely because my mentor mother did that same thing with her kids.  It doesn’ty mean quite as much as it used to, since Sonic has opened up on our end of the ‘hood, but we still do it.  In fact, because we now have a Sonic in our ‘hood, we often celebrate all kinds of stuff, like:

• yay, TAKS is over — regarding all the kids.
• yay, you were commended on the TAKS, READING AND MATH — regarding the Boy. 
• yay, you will never take the TAKS again — regarding the Senior.

and of late, since the new Sonic is just down the street:

• yay the sun is shining
• yay it’s raining
• yay I have gas
• yay it’s Friday
• yay it’s 2 and it’s Happy Hour at Sonic

Yeah…we’ve sort of gotten spoiled and made a lot of ‘new traditions.’  The thing is though, we are still sitting in the slot at Sonic, or sitting in our living room, making memories…I mean, how can i tell that my kids won’t grow up and say to their kids, ‘HEY KIDS, your grandma always took us for frosty drinks whenever there was a:

• good grade
• good test score
• end of school day
• first day of school day
• an orthodontist appointment
• a dentist appointment
• the end of a long day of shopping
• the beginning of a long day of shopping
• or…summer soltice

What i hope for my kids…ALL OF THEM, and there are a shitload…is that they take the small things and make them ‘traditions.’  I hope for them that they realize that it is the small things that deserve celebration, just as much as the big things…and i hope they realize that those small things ARE the big things.  And I hope for them that the remember the small things…because, I think, too many times we focus on the BIG THINGS…and (I) sometimes tend to think that the small things aren’t important.

But, today, after a fun family movie day, I am going to focus on the small things.  i want to think that way later on, maybe when I’m gone, and maybe when i am their babies’ Nani, they will think back to the days when we spent Sunday afternoons watching action movies and eating enough buttered popcorn that Nani spent the rest of the afternoon in the toilet dealing with all the buttered popcorn.   I want to think that they will equate New Year’s Day with pork and ‘kraut and mashed potatos and blackeyed peas. 

I would like to think that the kids think of more traditions than even i remember…like that I fuss every Thanksgiving that i don’t have a gravy boat, or that every Christmas i make a perfect pecan pie…or that whenever everyone is here i try to make chicken spaghetti or spaghetti or chicken pot pie…

And yes, i just realized that so much of what i would like my kids to remember has to do with food…

which is tradition, I guess, since so many of my memories of childhood revolve around food…

is that a bad thing, really?

Finally!

We seem to have a budding ‘tradition’ here at the Casa.  I have worried over the fact that we, as a blended family, don’t have many ‘traditions.’  It seems that this one is going here and those are going there…and we seem to be the place where whoever is left eats whatever we eat on the day that we proclaim it to be the day to celebrate. 

And we’re fine with that…really.

But of late, it seems that we have started a little ‘tradition.’  We hit the church house and then hit the movie theater.  Last week we saw Journey to the Center of the Earth and tomorrow…BATMAN.  The Boy really seems to love this new ‘tradition.’ 

And hey, I get to eat movie popcorn again…and there is not one thing I can say bad about that…

So, here’s to new ‘traditions.’

Family Secrets

As I have gotten ‘older,’ I have begun to realize that some of my ‘family secret’ cooking secrets need to be shared with these girls who are about to be out on their own…in some form or fashion.  I mean, perhaps the Teacher is invited to a barbecue and they need potato salad…perhaps The Longhorn wants to cook spaghetti for Christie and ‘Brad,’ and perhaps UMHB wants to make the mashed ‘taters to go with whatever her friends are cooking up for dinner. 

How could I, in good conscience, send these people into the world without the sacred family recipes that will make them INFAMOUS?!?!?

That’s right, i can’t.

So, I have decided to divulge just a few of the family recipes…or at least the secret ingredients to said recipes.

…and to you, too.

My spaghetti sauce is made perfect, and just like my mother’s, because:

1)  I don’t drain the hamburger and…

2)  I add the 2 cans of Traditional Heinz sauce and 1 large can of mushrooms before the meat is all the way done and…

3)  I throw in about a half cup of ketchup or a good sprinklin’ of sugar to cut the acidity of the tomato sauce.

My secret ingredient to my signature potato salad, aka as ‘Funeral Salad’ because for all the years we attended Calvary Baptist Church, i was on the list to bring food to the funeral dinners…and my potato salad was always requested, is…

BACON PLUS BACON GREASE.

That’s right…my signature potato salad is infused with bacon and bacon grease. 

I came up with the recipe as sort of a fusion between my mom’s traditional German potato salad and the potato salad I learned how to make at Larry’s Barbecue.” 

In other words, all the yummy goodness of traditional barbecue place potato salad with a little German thrown in. 

No one who has ever eaten it doesn’t love it…no one doesn’t want to dip chips in it…no one doesn’t want to rub it on themselves…

Just sayin.  If you want a more specific recipe because you want people to adore you, shoot me a comment or an email.  I’ll share.

My other secret ingredient that i quizzed the kids over this evening was…what is the secret ingredient to Mom’s mashed potatoes?

That one is easy…real butter and sour cream…what you come up with is baked potatoes, only whipped to perfection.  Hint–Put the potatoes back on the burner for a second to dry up some of the residual water…then break out the mixer and beat them bad boys til they scream uncle.  Creamier the better.  Add more butter…can’t fail with that.

So, at least i send them off with a recipe that is good for a barbecue, good for a dinner at home, and the mashers if you are the one making the mashers for a dinner…

And these are just a few…I’ll save the dumpling recipe and the chicken pot pie secrets for when they are more ready…

But these, they can take and fly…

and invite me for dinner.

happy blogiversary

I have been here for one year.  this has been such a good outlet for me, and i have to thank leterfly.blogspot.com for getting me into this whole blogging thing.  I have loved every minute of this last year.  I have loved every day that i have THIRTY hits, for petesake.  THIRTY?  woohooo.  I have enjoyed every moment of telling my stories about Glen Rose and Olene and life as i knew it ‘back then.’  I have enjoyed the outlet to brag about my kids…and about how well this ‘new gig’ has worked out for me.  I have enjoyed having this outlet when Rob is napping and I feel the need to update what is going on in my life. 

I dont’ know who the 30-something of you are, but know that i am thankful that you pop in and read my ramblings.  Know that i read you religiously every single day (instead of working) and care about your shit almost like it was my own shit. 

I heart all of you who I read and appreciate everyone who reads me.

 

Happy one-year Bogiversary What-A-Mother, if I do say so myself.

Things I sorta Love about my Life…

and sorta don’t.

I sorta love the fact that I have a friend like Lesa, who makes delicious sourdough bread and brings me a hot loaf, straight out of the oven.  The Boy sorta loves it that she brings her Dane over at the same time so that he can take a break from doing NOTHING and play Rock Band for a minute, then show him a YouTube video and show him some other stuff on the computer.  I sorta love that she is going to pick up The Boy in the morning to go to DinoWorld with the church group and I will pick him up at 1. 

I sorta don’t love that i will eat the whole freakin’ loaf of sourdough bread and probably grow yeast out of my eyeballs…I sorta don’t love that my eyeballs isn’t where yeast is going to grow out of if I eat the whole loaf…

Oh, wait…I sorta love the fact that my body is so used to beer yeast that i am probably immune to said yeast.

I sorta love the fact that I am married to a man who could give a shit less that I am “fluffy.”  It is so nice to know that the man you are betrothed to doesn’t think ugly things about you as you walk away…

I sorta don’t love the fact that because i am married to a man who loves me unconditionally I have sorta ‘relaxed’ too much…even for me.

I really sorta love my house…even with all it’s shithole-ness.  I love it because despite it’s plumbing problems and electrical problems, this has been a happy place for me.  This is where The Boy took his first steps…this is where we have a shed where we can hole up in and watch bad summer TV while the kids watch Hannah Montana and other stuff we can’t stand.

I sorta don’t love that it is hot out here sometimes, but we stay out here to watch bad summer TV anyway.

I sorta love the fact that The Teacher has a job for the fall and is planning to move out and start her own life…

I sorta don’t love the fact that she won’t be here come fall-ish.  I have to admit that i will miss her presence…and i will miss the fact that she won’t be here to go fetch Banana Split Blasts from Sonic.  I have to be honest and say that I sorta won’t love not having her to chat with while i am puttering around in the kitchen.  I do sorta hope that she will come to visit often as long as she is living in town.  Because, to be honest, she has been a no-pain-in-the-ass stay arounder.  I am hugely grateful that we have been able to provide her with a soft spot while she found her place.  I wouldn’t trade this last year for a million dollars. 

Okay, maybe for a million…but not for a half million.

I guess the thing is that so often we focus so much on the negative things…and lately, i just can’t.  Good fortune has smiled on this family of late and i can’t think of the negative before the positive.  So, while I realize that I am going to eat a whole loaf of sourdough and pay the consequences, and I have to deal with the fact that because i am so comfortable in my relationship that i have gotten uncomfortable in my own skin, and I live in a house that has so many issues that often times i cuss it unmercifully, and my 23-year-old is still in the nest…I have got to recognize that I am just so totally blessed. 

And i’m just glad that my mindset has turned…I am more able to focus on the fact that I have a decent house, albeit with issues, and a daughter who is going to teach our future, and a husband who loves me regardless of my shortcomings…and friends who bring me HOT BREAD.

i don’t see how you can focus on anything negative when you have all that…

so, sue  me.

no, don’t.

Random Update via Bullets

• I had the fullest week EVER last week, with Kristin and the kids and the zoo and Fossil Rim and dinner at the Meskin restaurant and lunch at the Big Cup.  I haven ‘t had that much fun during a work week in a long time.
• I have discovered that I have an uncanny talent at picking who Ms. Universe is going to be…second year in a row I picked the winner right off the bat.  Ms. Venezuela won it…and I called it the second i saw her pretty yellow evening gown. 
• I also picked this season’s American Idol wayyyyyy early in the contest. 
• Furthermore, I will go on record to say that I am watching Nashville Star (shut up it’s a slow summer TV season and i am a slut for reality TV) and from the very first show I chose Gabe Garcia, Coffey, and my girl from Danworthington Gardens, TX, Melissa.  I will say that it will come down to Melissa and Gabe and at this point, I can’t call it…they are both from Texas and they are both crazy talented. 
• I discovered today that if I say “I’m going to mow,” it will rain a downpour. 
• I have discovered that I have become very attached to one of the bloggers I read every day, even if she doesn’t post every day and I am concerned for her and pray for her.  I have found, we are a lot alike and I feel what she is going through to my core…
• I realized today that school is going to start in…about a month.  I will go on record that i am not really ready for my youngest daughter to be a senior in high school…that the Boy will be a 4th grader doesn’t worry me so much…but I won’t be sending him off to college at 17 either…
• the teacher is looking for an apartment and that is exciting…she also has started a little blog of her own at  msdoe.wordpress.com.  Read her…it is a little chronicle of what is it to be 23 and the one who is going to educate future Americans.  she is ready for the daunting task.  I am excited to see what she does with this gig.  She’s ready, I think…and as the time comes closer, I think she will get more ready and stop thinking of herself as “the sub” and start thinking of herself as ‘the teacher.’  I couldn’t be more proud of her.

Okay, that’s enough for me for the night…I’ve had a full week…and tomorrow starts just another work week…and i should consider going to sleep instead of watching the rest of David Letterman and Craig Ferguson…but I’ll stay up….

Kristin and Chrisyub Go To Fossil Rim…

with the kids.

Now I am right here to tell you that I have lived in this area for most of my life and grew up in Glen Rose and knew all about Fossil Rim Wildlife Park, yet had never been there until today. 

How stupid is THAT!?!?

All I can say is this:  If they wanted to charge me 20 bucks or 30 bucks to be able to touch a zebra because he is practically in the van with me and have a giraffe look into my sunroof at me, patiently waiting for some food, I would say HERE TAKE MY MONEY AND LET ME AT IT.

And if the animals weren’t enough, then you have this view

The whole experience is absolutely breathtaking and one I would recommend to anyone.  There is just something magical about rounding a curve and seeing ZEBRAS.  There really is. 

We were just about out when these ‘yak-ish’ things decided to lengthen our stay.

Them yaks got my blood ta boilin’

Kristin and Chrisyub Go to the Zoo…

with our kids.

History:

When I started editing six months or so ago, Kristin was one of the first fellow editors to pop in via IM and say hi and welcome me to the team.  I have to say that almost immediately…no, immediately, I knew that she was a good sort…good people, as we call them here in Texas.  She is a 26-year-old single mom to two amazingly gorgeous, articulate children.  She has had, again as we say in Texas, a rather large row to hoe and has hoe-ed that row so successfully, it is inspiring.  I will go on record right here and say that I haven’t met that many 26-year-olds who inspire me. 

But she does.

At any rate, over the last several months something I have said inspired her to plan a vacation to my fair state.  She is staying here in my fair city and doing stuff in Fort Worth and Dallas and Glen Rose and I’ve planned to do some of the fun stuff with her. 

My daughter, the Longhorn, said to me over the weekend…uh, I think it is going to be a little awkward when you meet in person, yet, gladly…it wasn’t.  When I picked up Kristin and the kids this morning, it was just all HEY, LET’S GO TO THE ZOO!!! 

It seems that Kristin is just like a little soul sister…

She apparently felt comfortable enough with me to mock me for GETTING LOST on the way to the Fort Worth Zoo, a place where I have gone damn near every year i’ve ever had an elementary school student.  The good news was she got a really good shot of the Fort Worth skyline, however accidentally.  I’m not sure if she got a shot of the church-ish type building called “Meet Jesus at the Slab,” where we pulled off the highway to call The Teacher for directions. 

We finally did arrive at the zoo and in a word, I’ll just say it was HOT.  HOT was the word of the day.  But we conquered that mofo and saw dang near everything and the kids had Dippin’ Dots to boot, which, incidentally made the whole day for The Boy.

The high point for me, though, was when Kristin and the kids came over tonight for dinner.  I made chicken spaghetti and garlic bread and some bag salad, along with some assorted cheesecake (I did not make) and some tasty watermelon.  What can I say…Adrian and Liv didn’t love the chicken spaghetti, but they did like the cheesecake and watermelon…so…SCORE!

One thing is for sure…Rob had a huge time with Adrian and Liv, throwing the football around with Adrian, then hitting some golf balls, and then a fun, fun bike ride.  He loved those kids and has since offered to keep them. 

And I gotta say…I do, too. 

Wednesday, we are going to Fossil Rim and I cannot wait to see those kids, and the Boy’s face when a giraffe sticks it’s 36-inch-long tongue down into our food cups.  It is going to be another great day that I will be honored to share with this sweet young mom and her kids. 

The Boy is also excited that on Friday, we get to keep Adrian all day while Kristin and Liv go see some marionette show in Dallas of The Little Mermaid…and i gotta think that Adrian will be just as excited to miss it…LOL.

I just have to say that I am honored that this young woman has seen fit to come here and share time with me and mine. 

With that said, here are some photos from the day

Little Liv loves the penguins

We got the kids all together for a shot by the elephant exhibit

It was a good, great day. 

Here’s to new “old” friends and sharing life experiences with them.